Is the Slapchop the answer to all that is wrong with my life?
Huckster Fritz who has been all over my TV in commercials ad nauseum for the Slapchop Food Chopper, has been giving me advice on how to improve my life. He tells me my life is boring, but that I can stop having a boring life -- if I get the Slapchop.
He tells me that I don't need to cry anymore....that if I get the Slapchop, my tears will end (onions not included).
He tells me the Slapchop will make me thin again, one slap at a time...then I can wear bikinis and drink martinis (with my linguini and fettucini).
What have I been MISSING?
Oh Fritz, are you the modern day Messiah for all that I have been missing? WHAT were we THINKING before you showed up with the Answer? All we need is the Slapchop, right? Depression and Obesity will go bye-bye.
What do you think? Is Fritz your Savior now too?
He had me at Shamwow...... (sniff,sniff, eyes glistening...)
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